mba/6

The end of a term ,the euphoria of packing bags, checking flight schedules, arranging conveyance to the airport/ railstation; the happiness of getting home after three months.
Three whole months of expectations, frustration, anger, sorrow, bitching, complaining, bereavement slogging, tension, deadlines, pressure, ECO, OB and finally the end terms and now the break. Quite a life huh?
Many make a statement that they are going to get back to life once they get home to their place. But i guess there is some fallacy in that statement. There is an illusion that time plays on the human mind of being static when it actually moves fastest. My place now may not be mine anymore, it may have changed a little or a little too much. People, once my friends might be a little less close. But since I am not part of that time web at my place, i assume that things are just as i left them when actually, the neighbors dog might have died a month ago, your favorite food joint might have closed down, that hot girl next door might have got married already and when we hear such things, we are jolted to the harsh reality that everything changes. Its not philosophy but plain truth. Life goes on, for you, me and the world.
So going home with the illusion of finding he same people willing to give the same priority and time to you might be a mistake.
Life i guess is becoming more and more campus centric now. The time we follow, the things we do the habits we cultivate, everything is based on how it adapts to life at the institute. Readers, this is where life is i guess and we go home on a holiday much like we visited our grandads place during summer vacations, its nice there but its not home exactly
But now homeward bound and to quote Captain Hook
"Shipward ahoy Seaward Ho"

Oruganty

why do i blog?

a question i should have put like an year ago,it would have saved the time for many a poor readers who strayed into te forbidden url and redeemed their sins by reading my ramblings. But honestly, why do i blog. It does not pay me to blog so its purely non monetary. It does not give me any reputation or good will so its not non monetary also. The blog does not make me popular among the young chicks so that they dig for me most of my female friends detest the blog. It does not provide me spiritual gratification and peace cos i dont practise spiritual ypga when i blog. It does not bless me with carnal pleasures of any kind cos there are no naked pictures of women on my blog site
It does not make my standard of living any better cos the economy of the country is still the same. it does not make me feel any safer cos there is still corruption in procuring arms deals
it does not make me feel satisfied cos there is no fulfillment of any kind. It does not make me feel lighter cos typing is not a form of motor excercise. It does not make me look handsome(even god couldnt do that) what the f is a blog
It wont make the world a crime free place. it wont make the world a peaceful place. It wont support the cause of gay marriages and equal rights. It wont let me win equal rights for women and the minorities
it wont improve my grade in the tests and quizzes
it wont grow hair on a balding scalp
it wont reduce a fast expanding waistline
then what does it do
it makes u waste ur time so that u also do nothing to solve the mentioned problems and blame it on me for writing this blog

so all that my blog does is to reduce ur feeling of guilt

and yea
like i always sign off as if i am the most renowned writer

oruganty

huh??

Sometimes a few questions haggle my poor cerebral scarcity of grey matter, why am i here? what am i doing here? why am i doing what i am doing? why am i asking questions about it also. I have been writing random ramblings nowhere remotely conected to my banal existence if u didnt realise that then lemme explain that my previous post " epitaph" really doesnt fortify existence its for dead people u bird brained verbally challenged moron. oops no no i take that back no more truths about my readers now on, i am going to account my banalities in future posts. for how long u ask? oh u care!!! u actually care?? man i am surprised!!! but anyways it goes on till i want to continue it or when there is nothing left to write, meaning i die(dont smile and fantasise)
the past week has been a measly existence. what with sleep being the scarcest commodity on campus. i mean gimme a break how do u expect us to sleep when we have a table tennis table outside the room and a badminton court right in front with flood lights (i need to charge the insti for the publicity) so if ua re not studying or lechhing or in the library ( studying never includes the library ) or involved in nocturnal sojourns of imaginary carnal pleasures, u play the above mentioned games. And being a southie really helps here u know, like if u miss the ball u just say " vothha" it is pretty unisex as far as the subject is considered and the others just stare at u like a space ship landed on u. More interesting is the jingoism u cna exhibit and get away with it cos u are a southie, let me explain, u have a ganesh chathurthi or something and u have had like a bad day because of anything ranging from constipation to bad grades, u just put it on the fact taht u are a minority here and u cant adjust to the practises here and that "we southies" are different, we are like more conservative and not so ahem "open" to things. It really helps cos if u are in a f all mood and generally wanna make someone else bad about his genesis , u go to the northie who is actually very sweet and tell him " we southies are different and how we are not like the rest, how this place is so anti southies. how " we southies dont get to eat the authentic south indian food. The scope of the idea is as much as ur creativity goes, u could possibly say that southies are endowed with ESP and say that aliens are going to attack. or better spread the word around that southies are very cultured and gingerly with the opposite sex ( hey watching them without batting an eyelid like they have been plastered doesnt count as anything more than watching tv without the remote in the other guys hand, u are really helpless)
Then when everyone knows ur double standards, u can change ur strategy from offense to sympathy. Try fitting in, " we southies are square pegs in round holes here" we are trying our best ur fluent hindi conversations are giving us a complex or hit the nail right at the head. The northie crowd are ignoring us and making fun of us cos we are a little bit different. For the historically inclined, they can quote Martin Luther or Lincoln about the oppression of the dark skinned by the fair skinned.
i love to continue but then i just realise that i am gonna stay in this place for two years and this blog, if read by any other life of campus will terminate my existence forever kya karein "we southies..."

An Epitaph

The beginning of an end
The sojourn ceases
The journey stops
The day dying

Amidst the twilight of dusk
I search for yet another sunrise
With the hope to see the horizon
The mystical line of rendezvous

Am I hallucinating?
Is it a game that hope plays on a feral mind?
No answers
None awaited, rhetorical

I watch the sun dip its last corona in the watersI watch the day ending
I am amused by the cycle
The cycle in a microcosm

Is it an illusion?
Nightfalls, day breaks
A mere play of words?
Or a theater of emotions

I am audience to the chirps
Of resting tired plumed
A time when my flesh is weak
A time when my spirit vanishes

I feel the zephyr
Scented marigolds
Dying tonight
Awaiting rebirth

The smell the feel the sight
A plethora of emotions
An end to all beginnings
A beginning to all ends

Venturing into my thoughts
I search for a twilight in me
The dusk of life
The dawn of death


I find no dawn
I find no dusk
I find the engulfing void
Of loneliness in life

Where the birds don’t chirp
Where the zephyr is still
Where the sun never rises
Where the dusk never breaks

A twilight of suspended animation
A dusk eternal
When each pore of my body waits
For an end that is allusive

Oruganty